Rcjp's Weblog

August 15, 2003

Fuerteventura Holiday

Filed under: misc — rcjp @ 4:46 pm

I first landed in Fuerteventura mid July, low season apparently. A more appropriate term may be touched down as the first hour of so driving through the countryside from the airport down to Jandia felt more like a lunar expedition.

The rocks littering the entire island are called volcanic spree and it was stressed by the tour rep that it was not building rubble! Although given the vast amount of building work across the island that would be entirely possible.

I enjoyed the holiday, mostly lazing on the beach and choking on the salt spray (Fuerte apparently means ‘windy’ and it is!) except the mealtimes, these I started to dread. Wine brought to my table was dispatched by the waitress with such violence, once most of the cork was out of the bottle, from the near vertically inverted bottle that I felt the need to lean back from the table.

After a careful slurp from my brimming wine glass, I commenced battle to retain what food I’d brought from the buffet on my table. I do not know how the staff eat at home but it clearly is, how can I put it, in one go. The merest hint of my knife and fork settling on the plate, even though not together, signaled the start of an competition for the staff of the large restaurant to race and retrieve it. This made me wonder if they get paid a bonus per plate. Spookily they would sneak up from behind when you weren’t ready, ask if you had finished and since you were still chewing whatever head movements you made were interpreted as yes. At one point, and I kid you not, one of the prowling staff used the back of my chair, whilst I was eating, to change their trajectory.

But of course, being English, I didn’t complain. I took the holiday to consider moving to a sunnier climate away from England’s dullness. I asked the barman ,”When does it rain here?” He sighed and said, “Maybe one day in the spring, for about 50 minutes. Its just sun, sun, sun.” He looked more fed up than I did about our constant drizzle, I explained we had the opposite problem and then it struck me: perhaps he looks forward to holidays in a dank rainy climate with all our flora and fauna, canals and streams.


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